Parents in the Greater Nashua area have a variety of different views as to when, to what extent, and how much access their children should have to electronic communications, whether it be access to websites, e-mailing or texting friends, or establishing their own web page through Facebook, My Space, or other sites. Restricting and supervising access to the internet at home is an important start, but it is not enough. Some children, at the urging of their friends, establish an e-mail or web page they can access when visiting their friend’s house whose parents may provide more liberal access to computers. Parents who are concerned about limiting access to their child’s electronic communications, in addition to restricting home use of the computer, should have a discussion with the parents of any friend whom their child is visiting about computer access. Just as we, as parents, want to confirm that an adult will be present at the home while our children are visiting their friends, you should feel free to speak with those parents about your restrictions on electronic communications and confirm that the children will not be using the computer for internet access, or if so, it is supervised within the parameter of access you place on your children.
Furthermore, if the friend has a cell phone, your child may be using that phone to text others. The decisions parents make as to controlling texting between adolescents may limit or prevent or text exchanges, just like e-mail, from becoming abusive and cause emotional distress to their children.
Lastly, a parent who has determined their child is mature enough to have a cell phone, perhaps with unlimited text capabilities, can and should still set ground rules as to its use. One obvious rule is to take the phone away from the child at bedtime so that she cannot text all night to her friends. Like in other areas of our child’s development, children need their parents to act like parents and to set limits on electronic communications.